THE POWER OF LETTING GO! A key element in manifesting anything in your life.

stock-photo-transportation-people-colours-lagos-nigeria- (2)

I am reminded of a time when I so badly wanted to visit the beautiful continent of Africa.

Africa is where my husband is from. Africa is where my ancestors are from. It seemed like everything was coming up to stop me from making this dream a reality.

Here are a list of things that came up:

My husband and I had other obligations and things that needed our financial attention. If he traveled, then I needed to stay home to take care of our business that he ran. I was either pregnant and couldn’t travel or I had just given birth to a baby. We also had another business that I ran that required me to be hands on, if I didn’t work it, the monies stop flowing. It seemed like circumstances was not lining up for me.

I even accused my hubby for not wanting to take me to the place he grew up.

But the truth is, my husband wanted everything to be comfortable for me when we arrived in his hometown. He wanted my first time visiting the place he grew up to be an amazing experience.

I assured him that I can handle anything. I am a girl who has been through something. I didn’t grow up with a silver spoon in my mouth. It didn’t matter where I stayed, I wanted to see where my ancestors were from. I could feel Africa in my bones.


It seemed like this dream of going to Africa was taking forever. I would have words back and forth with my husband about it, I made it a real issue. My husband assured me that we will go Africa and all I needed to do was trust and be patient. But my patience was running out.

So one day, I decided to let go of the anxiousness of going to Africa. I truly let it go in my heart. I decided to be content with it, and not let it ever be an issue between my Husband and I.

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:6)

Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” – Hebrews 13:5

  • Yes It happened, and it happened so fast! My time had come! The opportunity to visit Africa finally presented itself to me.
  1. I didn’t own my business anymore, we didn’t have any major financial obligation. I wasn’t pregnant. I wasn’t breastfeeding my son anymore. My babies were at the age that they could have a babysitter without me being in town. All of my circumstances were lining up for me.
  • But now all of a sudden, I had some resistance towards going to Africa. I remember saying to God, “you are going to make me go aren’t you?” At that time, I was not willing to part from my babies for that long period of time. I even told my husband, “you go without me, I don’t want to go.” I truly struggled! The only people I could trust to watch after my kids could not watch my children while I was in Africa.
  • Now here I was telling God and my husband that the timing wasn’t right. I asked God, “who is going to watch my babies while I’m in Africa and who could I trust? The only people I could trust with my kids for that long period of time were my parents and my oldest daughter. My daughter had to work and my parents were traveling on the same dates I would be traveling to Africa.

faith-612460_1920But God! He is faithful.

One day, while talking to a friend and telling her that I have an opportunity to go to Africa but needed someone who I could trust to watch my children before I could even entertain the offer, she told me that she also had an opportunity to take a trip out of the country and needed a babysitter to watch her child. She asked me if we could exchange babysitting services.

When I tell you that everything lined up for me, I mean everything. Oh my God! God supernatural assigned his angelic host to escort me to Africa. On top of that, God blessed me with a mini vacation! I had time alone, away from the kids while I traveled to retrieve my passport and my Nigerian visa.

Listen to all I had to go through to get to Africa. God provided for me supernaturally every step of the way! He assigned people who showed me favor to get me to Africa. I could feel the prayers of my husband and the intercessory prayer warriors in Africa, praying for my journey to Africa!

I needed to update my passport, and at the time I would be traveling to Africa, my passport would not be ready if I sent it through the mail. So I had to travel to Chicago because they give out passports on the spot. Yes! Mission accomplished, I received my passport!

But I needed a Nigerian visa to visit Nigeria, and now I had to travel to Atlanta to get a Nigerian visa. So I traveled to Atlanta, but when I arrived they told me that they didn’t not have anymore visas and I needed to go to New York if I wanted a Nigerian visa. They also told me that it was a holiday for them, and they were taking off and all of the Nigerian Embassy would be closed and I only had that day and the next day to make that happened, I didn’t know what to do! I said what! You guys are suppose to keep Visas in stocked, that is why you guys are an Embassy.

I didn’t want to travel to New York, and I felt like I did all this traveling for nothing! The Embassy in Atlanta told me all the information they could tell me and I was left to figure the rest out on my own. I heard a lady say I could over night the forms and fees if I can get some one in their processing center who would receive it and process my forms. That was my only hope! I told myself if only I could talk to someone at the New York Embassy. I attempted to call and could not get anyone but a recorder.


I was frustrated and was about to give up but I heard in my spirit, “call again,” and I pushed a different button. I got a lady who works in the processing center. She gave me so much favor. She told me what to do and gave me the number to her direct line. My husband and I worked hard to get everything we needed to process this Visa. We paid all of the fees and filled out all of the forms and sent it overnight. I did all of this while I was still in Atlanta and my husband was at home in St. Louis. The next day, I had my Nigerian visa in my hand! I traveled by bus, airplane, car and train to retrieve my passport and visa. On my way home from Atlanta, God had me to minister to someone who had just gotten out of prison and blessed him with a book that I hoped changed his life.

I love my husband even the more after visiting his beautiful family. I was forever changed after visiting Africa. God used my niece in-law and sister in-law Adeline and Pastor Enohor to bring me to Africa. My niece in-law Adeline, asked Pastor Enohor and I to speak at her workshop Girl Arize.  We formed a bond that day, and Pastor Enohor asked my husband and me to speak at a big conference she holds in Africa every year based on a book she wrote called End of Discussion.

I was on a divine assignment from God, I was able to minister to the people in Africa. God had me to deliver a special word to the people in Africa. I am so every grateful to God, my husband, my babysitter, my niece and sister in-law and all of the people God used to make my dream a reality.

I had the most amazing time while I was in Africa. I received the royal treatment while I was there. My people loved on me! I felt like I was home! Every thing I dreamed Africa would be superseded my expectation. I was in awww the whole time I was there. My bones oozed with excitement and my face never lost it smiled.

Africa was beautiful. Looking at the people as they hustle and bustle was beautiful. Shack houses, huts and big beautiful homes and building were beautiful. Watching thousand upon thousands of people working for themselves to feed their families both kids and adults was beautiful. Watching the traffic and crowded  buses, motorcycles and scooters rides was beautiful.

Life for some people in Africa maybe hard but Africa is rich in resources. Everything may not be idea living for some Africans and the struggle definitely real. I am not down playing that, but I chose to focus on the beauty of Africa instead of the negative stigmas.

Trust God, and then let go if you are feeling stressed out, overwhelmed or anxious that it is taking to long for your dreams or prayers to manifest.

Letting go is not giving up the dream. Letting go is allowing, allowing God to be God and you to be content in your current circumstances. God will work out all of the details for you. He is working everything out for your good.

Every step of the way was a divine connection for me. God lined up things at the right time because I chose to let it go.

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose. – Romans 8:28

And our great big God would do the same thing for you, if you just trust him!


Coach Angie!


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15 Things Wives Can Do To Win The Heart Of Her Husband

couple-495273_1920Wives I am asking you to give me a chance and listen to God’s heart beat in this message. I understand a lot of marriages are lacking communication, connection and closeness. Some of this is due to not understanding the male and female love language, some of this has to due with a lack of understanding of our roles in a biblical marriage and some of it has to do with not recognizing intruders that have entered into the marriage covenant and some of it is due to not taking the time to talk and invest in having a great marriage.

This is such a sensitive subject to talk about because there are no two marriages alike.

I know there are always 2 sides to every story, but 2 wrongs do not make it right either. I am called to women, not men, so wives, I will be talking to you only. I will be encouraging you to play your role even if your husband is not playing his. I know how frustrating and exhausting this can be but you are asking for closeness, connection and to be cherished in your marriage, someone has to be willing to be uncomfortable to make your marriage like God has ordained it and really, God is asking that to be you. God said, your husband can be won over by your conduct. I will share the scripture with you before I end this blog post.pexels-photo-241328.jpegI am only talking to Christian women who believes in biblical marriage, trust me, I am not there yet but my aim and my goal is to live a Christ centered marriage and do it God’s way and not the worlds way. Like a fish out of water my flesh flip and flop sometimes as well.

Ladies before I get into this topic, my only goal is to partner with God to see the marriage covenant restored and to see wives feeling connected to her own husband.

I am only advocating healthy biblical submissiveness. I am not advocating a husband usurping his authority in a harmful abusive way.

I have an honest heartfelt confession, I am in love with my own husband, I am happy with my husband and I am happy in my marriage, even with that being said, we still need to address things that comes up in our marriage that needs to be discussed. One does not have a great marriage through avoidance, you have to talk about the issues that is on your heart. You can not hide things in your heart and expect to have a good marriage.

I am so grateful to have my husband in my life. God has blessed me with an amazing man. He is not perfect and guess what? Neither am I, but that does not take from the fact that he is amazing!14419664378_a95c1284ff_o.jpgAnd it is not because he makes me happy all of the time. I have decided that I am going to be happy in my life period. Do I have things that comes up that wants me to lose my joy? Yes I do, and sometimes I have to remind myself, this is not that serious, do not lose your joy over this and it is a constant reminder. I have decided that my happiness is not based in if my husband do everything right to make me happy. That is to much pressure for one person.

I have made many mistakes in my marriage. After 17 years of being married to my husband, I have learned a lot and will be learning until Jesus come back.

So I am setting my fears aside so I can help the wife who will listen. Some of the things I share with you, you probably are not going to agree with, but I can not run any longer about discussing real issues that are happening in marriages today.

If I am going to partner with God to see wives restored in their heart and their marriages, I have to deal with truth as it is shown to me in my heart. This is the take on marriage that God has given me to share.

I will expose the works of darkness as God downloads it in my spirt. I absolutely love the marriage union and I know God loves it as well. As I have listen to God minister to me about marriage, I realized that I had some very wrong distorted views about marriage.

Our husbands are very different from one another and what my husband needs most, your husband my not even care about, so I will admonish you to get to know your own husband, and do not base what your husband do against what someone else’s husband does.pexels-photo-256737But what I hope to help you with today is 15 things that every wife can do to win the heart of her own husband.

I can tell when a woman is not satisfied or content in her marriage or with herself, because she is always seeking outside of her marriage and herself for attention and conversation from someone else’s husband or to get notice by other men that is not her husband.

She tries to fill up her emptiness with shopping, working, giving all of her attention to her children, volunteering and just plain avoidance. She does not want to deal with the real issues that are going on in her heart and her marriage.

I agree with you, you should not leave this earth unfulfilled in your marriage. That is why you have to do everything with in your power to fight for the connection with your very own spouse, so if God forbids, if it falls apart, it is not because you did not give your all to your marriage.

Wives fight for connection from your own husband, seek attention from the one you chose to marry, any attention outside of that is a counterfeit replacement of the real and true love you could be experiencing from your own spouse.

Now like I said, this blog post is not for every married woman, you might not agree with some of the things that I share with you. This blog post is only for the married women who is NOT dealing with mental and physical abuse, cheating, drugs, alcohol and gambling addiction. If you are dealing with these issue, serious counseling is what you need because you my beautiful sister have to make choices that is going to keep you safe inside and out.

There is not one marriage that is perfect on the earth because there are no two people that are perfect. But marriage can be amazing if you are tuned in to your own marriage and not comparing your marriage to anyone else’s and if you can try to love and give your husband lots of grace, forgiveness, compassion and always focusing on his good qualities.character-1797362_1920I know communication can be hard in a marriage sometimes because in marriage one of you is either the confronter and the other person is usually the one who runs away from confrontation. But then again, you can have two people in a marriage that never confronts the issues that is going on in their marriage, therefore, making it very hard to talk about issues that needs to addressed in marriage.

I want to encourage wives not to shut down because you feel like your are not getting any real results. I want to encourage wives not to throw in the towel and walk away. I want to encourage wives not to grow bitter inside and hold unforgiveness towards their husband because you are feeling unappreciated, unfulfilled, neglected and unloved.

What I am going to encourage you to do is keep talking to your husband until you are heard, keep confronting intruders until they are destroyed, stay in prayer for your husband, your marriage and your family and keep fighting for a amazing marriage.

Make sure that you have done your part to ensure that you have a godly covenant before God and your husband. I do not proclaim to have all the answers, nor am I a marriage counselor. But sometimes it will take you going to a professional counselor to talk through the issue in your marriage. I would recommend a trusted Christian Counselor or Pastor.

I think some wives forgot how to make themselves happy, perhaps you have never been truly happy within yourself, especially if you never been single long enough to enjoy your own company. Some women always needed someone in their life to complete them.

Now there is a difference between

1. Down right disrespect and your husband acting like he does not have a commitment to your marriage by spending quality time with you and investing the time and attention that it takes to have a close healthy godly marriage.


2. You learning to enjoy your own company in the absence of your husband. There should always be sweet fellowship between the two of you, a coming back together to talk about your day and to reconnect emotionally, physically and spiritually.pexels-photo-28914.jpgYou should never allow anyone who claims to love you and have a covenant with you to get away with living a sloppy married life. Marriage is an investment and you are worth the investment it takes to ensure you have a respectful loving Godly covenant where the both of you are reaping the full benefits of your covenant.

What hurts my heart more than anything is to see a woman in her marriage covenant feeling lonely, helpless, defeated, cheated on, disrespected, afraid to speak up for herself and feeling like she is not valued in her marriage…….

Feeling like she can’t take care of her self, feeling trapped, devalued, not beautiful, not beneficial, feeling like she is not an equal partner with her husband and not knowing her covenant rights in her marriage.

I want to warn you against intruders, intruders are things, people and schedules that wants to replace true devotion with your spouse, with false devotions.

Intruders can creep in and still your covenant, your time and your marriage if your are not in tuned with the Holy Spirit.

Intruders never know the value of a godly covenant. They come in disguises, they come in things that seems important.

Intruders also wants you to be intimidated by them and they want you to keep it uncover. Intruders never want you to confront them or call them out on their undercover behavior.

Intruders are working to many long hours, always volunteering to many long hours to a worthy cause, social media, lustful under cover seducing women and men proverbs 9:13-18  has a lot to say about this.

Intruders can come in through always shopping, gambling, people pleasing and addictions of every comes in being to involved with what the children have going on more than pouring back into your husband.

Intruders comes in through spending long hours in the gym, more than you are spending time at home. Intruders comes in by watching to much sports and reality TV, and spending to much time with your extended family rather than your own husband. The Bible clearly states that we are to leave and cleave.

So we have to keep addressing issues in our marriages that are trying to keep us from investing into our marriage, things that are creeping in and trying to destroy the marriage covenant. We have to keep talking and fighting for our marriage because there are so many things that are calling for our attention and trying to lure us away from our marriages.

I want wives to know that you have a lot of influence in your marriage. You can use that influence for good or you can use that influence to tare down your home and marriage. The bible has a lot to say about the influence of a wife. Down below I listed some.

Proverbs 14:1 The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.

Proverbs 31:10-12
An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.…

Proverbs 24:3
By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established.

Proverbs 5:6
Adulterous woman does not ponder the path of life; her ways are unstable, she does not know it.

Proverb 9:13 ISV
The foolish woman is loud, undisciplined, and without knowledge.

Proverbs 7:11 She is boisterous and rebellious, her feet do not remain at home;pexels-photo-256735Proverbs 21:19 It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.

Proverbs 12:4 A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that makes ashamed is like rottenness in his bones.

Proverbs 25:24 It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.

Proverbs 27:15,16 A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.

Proverbs 15:17 ISV A vegetarian meal served with love is better than a big, thick steak with a plateful of animosity.

Proverbs 17:1 Better is a dry morsel, and quietness therewith, than a house full of feasting with strife.

Wives it will never benefit you to give the silent treatment to your husband, nor talking to him unkindly, sarcastic, talking down to him and being disrespectful to your husband. The only results it will yield is to push your husband farther away from you and towards intruders.

Now I do believe there is a time for silence when the conversation is heated and emotions are high, a time out break is needed until you can come back together and talk maturely.

I have been married going on 17 years and I am still learning what works and what do not work for my marriage.pexels-photo-299863.jpeg I know it takes two people to make the marriage work. It can be very easy to check out on your marriage if you feel like you have been the one during all the work to keep your marriage together.

I want to present to you the biblical way of loving your husband. Wives, you have to take your emotions out of the situations. I do understand God created you as the weaker vessel. I know your feeling can get hurt easily. I know wives try to give their all to keep the connection with their husband but I am going to encourage you to try even harder than you’ve been trying. Push yourself more than you have ever pushed yourself before.

Yes, I am asking you to set aside all that you think you know and pick up a biblical  perspective in loving your husband. I am asking you to set your feeling aside and your emotions aside and fight for the connection with your husband.

I want you to ask yourself could it be me and not him, matter of fact, I want you to do everything in your power to serve him from your heart. Do it to the glory of God and allow God to reward you. If your husband give you praise let it be a bonus on top of the praise that God has already given you. Just tell your husband thank you. It pleases the Lord that you are loving on his son. Do not look to your husband to give you validation, because you will give up if you do not see quick results.

I want you to have a happy attitude while serving your husband, I want you to do it like you would if someone was giving you 5,000 dollars for doing a good job. Guard your heart against complaining.

Serve your husband to the glory of God because this is your first ministry. You are his help mate.

Help mate:
1. a companion and helper.
2. a spouse.
3. anything that aids or assists, especially regularly:

I don’t know if you actually knew what you signed up for when you said your marriage vowels to him but lets delve even further.

1. a person or animal with whom one spends a lot of time or with whom one travels.
“his traveling companion” synonyms: friend, sidekick,  confidant, pal, chum, buddy, mate and peeps.

2. one of a pair of things intended to complement or match each other.
synonyms: complement, counterpart, twin, match; plane.jpgI do know you probably have a lot of responsibility on your plate like the kids, a job, the home, your relationship with God, your friends, maybe taking care of a family member, your volunteer work and then your husband.

He was never meant to be last but he was always meant to be first after your relationship with God and taking care of yourself physically, emotionally and spiritually so you can give out to everyone else, your husband is one of the most important person in your life and he should be treated as such. Even if you feel like he is not during his part.

Since you agreed to be his wife, you agreed to help him in any capacity he needs you to help him in. You are called to aid and assist him regularly, you are called to spend a lot of to time with him being his friend. You are called to travel with him, you are called to be his companion, his buddy, his pal. You are called to complement him or match him. You are called to be his peeps, twin, counterpart, chum and his mate.

Now these are just dictionary definitions of some of the things you signed up for when you agreed to be his wife. The Bible has so much more to say about your role as his wife. When you agreed to marry him, your body became his and his body became yours. You are called to give him pleasure sexually when ever he needs it.

There is something about knowing that a person really and truly love you, it is very hard to ignore it. So ask yourself have you been murmuring and complaining and shutting down and being bitter and having unforgiveness towards your husband because he is not taking care of you and not meeting your needs the way you need him to.

Have you really been giving your all in your marriage. I am not trying to set your feelings aside, I just want you to evaluate your actions as well. Ok wives, I am talking to myself as well.

If you do have an agenda God has called you to, make sure your husband is taken care of first. Prove to him that he is number one. Biblically you are called to assist him first. I know it sounds unfair but that is how it is done in the kingdom. This is not to make wives feel guilty, we all fall short and none of us are perfect, but we are asking for more in our marriages, are we giving more as well?pexels-photo-237372Have we as wives neglected our God given responsibilities to our husband and replace them with everyone else needs and concerns first? Have we put our own agendas and others agenda before our husband’s? Are we becoming bitter, complaining and getting angry at them about being their wife and the role we are suppose to be playing in their life?

Are they really first in our lives like we want to believe that they are?

We are called to assist them in what ever they need assistance in.

1 Peter 3:1-5 – Likewise, ye wives, [be] in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;  While they behold your chaste conversation [coupled] with fear.
Whose adorning let it not be that outward [adorning] of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
But [let it be] the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, [even the ornament] of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:

This scripture is telling you do this for your own husband and not someone else’s husband. Don’t find some other man more fascinating than your own husband. Some women would compliment someone else’s husband but not their own. It is not your business to try and get to know someone else’s husband or be curious about what he does. Be curious about your own husband find out more about him. The Bible talks about the simple minded woman, she seeks attention from someone else’s husband. She goes about trying to lure men that she do not have a covenant with. What she is really doing is committing adultery in her heart. I noticed that the scripture up top says be in subjection to your own husband. Even if your husband is not giving you the attention that you need stay loyal in your heart before God.

I don’t know all that you have been going through in your marriage and I know it can be very scary to let your guards down and become very vulnerable to your husband.

But I am asking you to fight for your marriage. I am asking you to put your emotions and your feeling aside and open your self up to loving your husband again, just like Jesus loves you when you constantly mess up or fall short with him. I am asking you to give your husband lots of grace and forgiveness. pexels-photo-288008.jpegI am going to share ways you can win the heart of your husband. I am going to ask you to be patient with the process before you see any results. You might see your husband heart turn in a week or you might not see your husband heart turn towards you for months. You are not perfect and you might mess up, get frustrated, and want to throw in the towel. When you do, just ask God for forgiveness and apologize to your husband for they way you disrespected him.

Serve your husband like you were serving King Jesus. The Bible says, “let him who wants to be the greatest, let him become your servant and whoever wants to be first be your slave.” Well wives, I know we can feel like we are slaves and maids sometimes.

But when you shift your mind to serving your husband because it is your 1st ministry, and serve your husband like you are serving in your own personal ministry, your children, your job because your name is out there and you put your heart into it because you want it to go well, and you do not want to look bad, and you want to serve the people God has called you to and you want God to be proud of you, is the same way you should put your heart and soul into serving your husband.

Sometimes this ministry don’t come with accolades and sometimes you may feel like you are getting the short end of the stick but I am a true believer that if you be diligent and do it to the glory of God. God will reward you and make sure you are well taken care of.

Matthew 20:25 Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many.” 

I want to bring special attention to why am I asking you to serve your husband like you are serving Jesus. Because in 1 Peter 3:1-5  it reads, Likewise, ye wives, [be] in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation [coupled] with fear.

God is saying just by you obeying and following the word of God, by speaking kindly to him, putting him first, being very respectful to him, loving on him, encouraging him, assisting him and serving him. Your husband is going to be won over to you by your good conduct.couple-254683_1920.jpgSo let me share 15 things wives can do to win the heart of her own husband.

  1. Respect him, Respect is huge for men, they thrive off of it.
  2. Talk kindly to him. I know sometimes husband are not as sensitive as they should be but talk kindly to him, instead of leashing back out to hurt his feeling, men are more frail than you think and can shut down after being disrespected.
  3. Be his friend, sit down and watch the game with him, get to know the things he like and do them with him often, spend time with him just running errands. Men love for their wives to hang out with them and spend time with him.
  4. Be willing to do what he ask of you without murmuring and complaining. Have a good attitude while serving him. Assist him in what ever he needs assistant in if it is not going to cause you to sin.
  5. All men do not require this, but be willing to cook him a good meal and serve it to him, it makes him feel taken care of. If he is the one during the cooking, then fix him a plate and serve it to him.
  6. Forgive him often and give him lots of grace.
  7. Compliment him and encourage him especially in front of others, always find something good to say about him. Tell him how proud you are to be married to him. Try not to speak negatively about your husband to no one.
  8. Smile at him often, let him know that you are happy, your husband would try to keep that smile on your face.
  9. Date your husband, keep things exciting and creative. Don’t wait for him to be creative, you do it.
  10. Make passionate love to him often, all the time, as much as he likes it.
  11. Do not correct him in front of the kids.
  12. Keep your appearance up and smell good for him.
  13. Be grateful. Tell him thank you, often, for the nice things you see him do.
  14. Pray for him all the time.
  15. Treat him like a King and help make life easy for him in anyway you can. 

I know this seems like a lot but God’s grace is sufficient for you, take it one step at a time. What is one thing you can do today that would bring the connection between you and your husband closer together?

Would love to hear from you, so leave a comment, like and subscribe to Breakthrough Blog 4 Women. Follow me on Instagram  and follow me on my social media links down below.

Coach Angie!

5 Things You Should Do When You feel Like Everything Is Falling Apart!

 “5 Things You Should Do When You Feel Like Everything Is Falling Apart.”

What things are consuming your thoughts? What are you so concerned about? Well Guess what? My God cares about it as well, you need answers and He is here to give them to you. I hear people saying God don’t speak to me. God speaks all the time but are you ready to listen to who God uses and what he uses to get the answers to you.

I woke up to this message, I learned to stop questioning myself and learn to trust the voice that is speaking. After all, I am just a vessel that has allowed the Heavenly Father to speak through me, rather the message is for me or for you, I am going to capture the conversation.

So what was God revealing to me upon waking up this morning?


1. When your world is changing around you, stay connected to God.

There is a tendency to disconnect from God and try to figure things out on our own. The urgency of the matter will try and get us to move to fast and react now. Sometimes out of haste we make the wrong move, and out of desperation we jump the gun to fast.

Seasons change, businesses change, locations change, your kids are changing, your marriage is changing, the way our world works is changing, your vision has changed and if we are not careful or in tune to what is going on around us, we would be wondering to ourselves what is going on, I never had to work so hard at trying to keep this thing going. It was once prosperous, we use to be so connected to each other, what happen to my babies, they use to tell me everything, I never had to work this hard to keep this business afloat.

We have to keep up with the times, our world is evolving. What was detestable to wear in public years ago, is now the new normal. Temptation is different now, unlike David in the Bible who stumble upon temptation when he saw Bathsheba taking a shower, now temptation comes to your front door and right in your face.

Social Media is the new game changer, and if you are in any kind of business, it is advantageous that you have some kind of on going social media presence. I know we want things to stay the same, but everything is changing. The way we relate to our kids have changed, you got to be the parent that is in the know, it is all kinds of influences that are effecting the way our kids are behaving. They speak in codes and ebonics, and the messages are hidden in the codes. Parents, we must be able to recognize the new language amongst our kids, so we can understand what our children are into.

The way you’ve done business has changed, your old tactics is not working anymore, it is time for you to find out where your customers are and what do they need from you. You should be contemplating on how you can better serve your customers? How can you make your customer feel important, and what will set you apart from all of the rest.

We are in the age of information, where you practically can do everything from the comfort of your own home. You can shop online, pay your bills on line and even go to church on line.

Churches are making it easy for people to connect with them and fellowship with their congregation, even if you live in a different state, town or city. You can connect with them and be in the same service with them via live streaming.

So why should your customers leave the comfort of their own home to patronize you, when there are so many options available to them. What experience would you give them to make it worth their while? I know some of the topics I am talking about sounds ridiculous, but while you are trying to figure it out, the world is changing.

I remember my husband and I went into this movie theater where we live. This movie theater use to be real popular. It was located in a high price neighborhood, so we just assumed that it is going to be a more mature crowd, but when my husband and I sat down, we realized that we were sitting amongst a new generation of young people and for once in my life, I felt like I was stuck in time. Everything about these young people were different, the way they looked, their mannerism was different, the way they spoke and the way they dressed were different. We did not fit in at all, my husband and I agreed that this was going to be the last time we visit that movie theater. One day we drove pass the movie theater, and they were upgrading it and made it into a upscale movie theater. We have been back several times since the new grand opening. Their clientele has changed. Now young and mature come there to watch movies..

How are you going to stay current when everything around you is changing? I know you use to score big with the old system but now it is not working with the new vision. Your hustle has to be different. You are going to have to find new ways of doing thing.


2. Embrace the change that is around you. 

How can you embrace change when it seems like things are falling apart around you. When you feel like you are falling apart inside. You do not have to accept the change around you but you are going to have to embrace it. Because whether the Bible agrees with it or not and whether you agree with it or not, it is changing or it has changed. The sooner you embrace it (I am not saying agree with sin) and find new ways of dealing with it, then you can find a solution that will make it work for the good of all that is involved.

Sometimes we just do not want to accept the way things are and we do not have to. But if you and I embrace the fact that it is what it is, then we can let go of the attachment that we placed on ourselves, that it is our job to fix it or fix someone. When we let go of all of the judgement, let go of trying to hold it all together, let go of the pride, let go of us trying to play God.

If we can let go and let God judge the situation, and we just learn to love and trust that what ever happens in this situation will work out for our highest good because we have surrendered and gave it to God, then God can step in and show us what needs to be done next.


3. Stay calm.

I think the mind goes into over drive trying to find solutions to why our world has changed and trying to find the pieces to put it all back together like it once was. You can really work yourself up into panic mode if you are not careful with your thoughts. I know it feels like you are not doing nothing to solve the problem if you just sit and be quiet. But being still is probably what you need to do so you can hear God speaking to you.

When you feel anxious, and like anxiety is trying to rise up on the inside of you, go into your quiet place and breathe. What is happening to you is that your thoughts are out of control. You have to bring your thoughts back into captivity. You do that by calming the mind through meditation and reading the scriptures. Psalm 37:25  says, I have been young, and now I am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging bread. If God said it, you better believe he is a man of his word!


4. Pray

Now that you have cleared the cutter in your mind, fill it up with talking to God about it. He is the only one who can show you what you need to do. Prayer changes things. Cry your heart out to God, be honest with him, real honest because it says in Psalms 66:18 – If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear [me]:. He knows everything about you anyway.

You are in a temporary season, make sure that you forgive anybody that have hurt you, betrayed you, offended you or abandoned you. Clear your heart of any anger, bitterness, malice and strife. In order for you to move forward and get your prayers answered,  you have to have a clean heart before God. God cannot forgive you until you have forgiven others. Matthew 5:14-15 For if you forgive men their trespasses, your Heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive yours.

Ask God questions, any questions you need answered. Let God know your fears and your struggles. Ask him for help! The Bible says in Psalm 46:1 (KJV) God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. I have included a link to scriptures that tells you that God will answer your prayers. Meditate on those scriptures. God wants to help you reestablish your relationships, your business, your finances, your self-esteem and anything else you need establishing. Being thankful and grateful goes along way, in fact God says, Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.


5. Strategize!

Ask God to show you your dream team? And surround  yourself with others who can help you get to the next level. If you are the only knowledgeable one in the room and everyone is listening to you, then who are you listening to. This is new territory for you. You have to swallow your pride and ask for help! Right now you are losing battleground. You have to get around people who defeated Goliath already. You need to loose your girlfriends who are not married and are trying to tell you how to leave your husband. You need to get around some seasoned woman who got down in the trenches and fought to keep the other woman from stealing her husband. You need to find your Naomi! You need to find your real prayer warriors! Ask God whose heart you can trust. Just because people around appear to be faithful doesn’t mean they are.

I love listening to Oprah tell her story about when she brought her own network. She said, this was new territory for her. Oprah was use to people showing up for her on her syndicated network. After 25 years of successful television, Oprah decided that she would start her own network. She just assumed with so many followers and loyal fans, they would  just follow her to her own network. She said what she didn’t realize is, everybody did not have cable and everybody wasn’t getting cable just to watch her. Oprah stated that in that season of her life, she was just getting back what she was feeling about herself on the inside. Which was shame, fear, she didn’t know what she was doing and feeling like she was failing. People were saying all kinds of cruel things about her and putting out negative energy about how her network was doing bad and how she is not going to make it, but in order for her  Oprah to change her current situation she had to change her inner dialogue.

The moment she started to change the story she was telling herself, in that moment she could find a solution to save her network. She had to shut down from listening to the naysayers both outwardly and inwardly. She had to get a different strategy. She had to ask for help. This was a very humbling experience for Oprah. She spoke on platforms I know she didn’t want to speak on. She partner with people that she didn’t think she would ever partner with. She use the power of youtube and the internet so people could continue to connect with her without paying for cable. She went on a Life Class Tour, she did things that she did not want to do, but she had to make up her mind that she was going to sink or swim. She chose to swim. I am sure Oprah felt vulnerable. She was use to people fighting to get on her show, now she was having to ask people to buy into her network. Oprah became a game changer and so can you. You have to get a plan in place and see it through. It might be uncomfortable but you can do it! Don’t give up! Fight for your life, family and your destiny!

I would love the here from you! Leave a comment telling me your thoughts about todays blog post. Follow me on Instagram @angelayourlifecoach  and like me on Facebook  I am tackling some autumn decluttering and I am sharing my journey with you! 

Coach Angie!